Tonight I was confronted by an angry Mom. It really rattled my cage. My day has not went so well to start with. I made really bad choices this morning as an Administrator. Ones that I seriously had to apologize for. Then during my "down" time I still was making bad choices, at least I didn't have to apologize for those choices. During the evening hours I worked really hard to get a grip and chill out and next thing you know, just as I thought it was all winding down and coming to a close, I'm faced with another choice. Thankfully this time, I also do not need to apologize for my actions. At least I held my tongue and used a little bit of wisdom.
This morning after I lost it, I prayed and asked God what He was trying to show me. And now here I am again shortly before bedtime wondering, "What are you trying to say to me God???" The easy thing to do would be to look at the people around me who are causing me to lose it and blame them. :) Now that makes me feel happy!
...the problem with that, is that kind of happiness will only last until the next bump in the road. And who knows, that could come tomorrow morning before I even head out the door!
Years ago I used to pray for God to grant me wisdom. I truly desire to make good choices; more than that, I desire to make wise choices. I can see that today, I have failed in the area of wisdom and I let my (stinking) self get the better of me. BUT, to quote Marilda, on Anne of Green Gables, "Tomorrow is always fresh with no mistakes". Tomorrow, I will make better choices and I will not allow my own selfish desires to overcome me.
God, please grant me the wisdom I need to make choices that will please You and that will build Your kingdom and not mine. Please renew me and refresh me as I sleep so that I can wake up with a fresh start and a fresh word from You. I love you...Trudy